Heidi Strobel (Amazon)

Jenna's equally awful partner in crime.

Heidi had no issue jumping into a majority alliance as quickly as possible and then immediately sit on her ass and watch the ugly people pick up her slack. First, Joanna called her and her crew out on their laziness, which she simply shrugged off as 'meh. Who cares? My alliance is gonna beat your alliance.' This continued all the way til her foursome with Jenna, Alex, and Rob when they all lied around on their backs with the same awful attitude of 'don't gotta.' Of course, when Alex screwed her over by going to Rob and spelling out for him it would be in his best interest to jump ship, Heidi decided now was the perfect time to continue being just as terrible as ever, this time with her excuse changing to 'what's the point? They're just gonna vote me out anyway.' Heidi, it's okay. You can say 'I'm used to avoiding physical labor by flashing my tits.' There's a certain amount of respect to be gained from that at least.

Of course, the only thing worse then her work ethic was her pitiful jury question. In a last ditch attempt to try and make herself feel better about losing and believe she was as special as the dumb boys trying to get in her pants said, Heidi decided to get Matthew and/or Jenna to jerk herself off with the 'anyone here more deserving then you?' question. When they both gave the wrong answer ('not you'), she continued to make herself more pathetic, saying 'I mean....is that the only person?' before Jeff had to tell her to sit down and stop making an ass of herself.



Lindsey Richter (Africa)

Lindsey sucked. From her walk across Africa to her final words, Lindsey was truly a painful sight to behold.

First, no one cares about your period Lindsey. I don't know who you were trying to bond with (and am even more mystified that it worked apparently since she got an alliance out of the deal) but that's info you should keep to yourself.

Second, I know you're excited to be in a competition and all, but there is a thing called 'trying too hard.' When Lindsey wasn't giving quivering confessionals about how overwhelmed she was feeling, she was trying her best to be a badass. My favorite 'Lindsey sucks' moment came when she suspected that Silas may be lying to her about what side he was on and gave what I assume is her idea of an intimidating face as he explained his side of the story, but only ended up just looking like a crazy girlfriend who needs to know why you couldn't pick up your phone after the second ring.

Lastly, if there is information you want kept private--like oh say--votes casts against you, the best thing you can do for yourself is to shut your Goddamn gob about it. Lindsey took the complete opposite approach and blah blah blahed the ears off her allies Kim and Brandon about how important it was that the ex-Boran members not get the intel that she has votes against her. Finally, her luck ran out when she needed to have yet another conversation about it and Kelly was within a mile radius of her loud mouth and got her voted out. It was a fitting end to what I consider one of the worst Survivor players ever.