I don't like people who behave in ugly ways. That should be clear with my large disdain for Russell, Phillip, Lisi, Alex, Fairplay, Judd and 75% of everyone else ranked before Ben.
Ben has the impressive achievement of being the only person on Samoa to give viewers thought on who was the bigger asshole: him or a hobbit on crack. He was loud and abrasive, played dirty in immunity challenges, rubbed salt in the wounds of people he had the upper hand on, took a page out of Russell's 'how to jerk off in a personal interview' book, and...yeah. The 'ghetto trash' remarks. I'm not saying Yasmin isn't a piece of work (more on her later), but Ben didn't exactly handle her in a way that made him look like a class act. He isn't exactly bright either. Russell tells a small white lie about Ashley and then Ben gives her the lip because...I don't know....they both agree that women are stupid? And it's silly decisions like that that make Russell believe he actually is the Jesus Christ of Survivor so shame on you for that Ben.
The only two things that keep Ben from being further down on the shit pile is 1) he didn't make it past episode three and 2) more importantly, he apparently patched things up with Yasmin which might mean there's more to him then the jackwad we saw for three episodes.
Dave Cruser (China)
I'm not the biggest China fan, which is kind of unusual in the Survivor fanbase world, and a lot of it stems from its bland cast. You'd think someone with a loud personality like Dave would be a breath of fresh air for that season, but Dave is sadly the obnoxious, annoying loud.
I don't know how Dave didn't consider how his cruddy personsality might be an issue in a game where social intereacting is a large part of the game. Which is why Dave should consider himself fortunate he got a as far as he did when his team decided to keep him over someone else....twice....on purpose. Dave spent his four episodes telling nearly everyone on his tribe how awful their work ethic was and pissing everyone he could off. When wreacking havoc at his own camp got boring, he decided to annoy the people in the enemy camp (James called and he said your hugs weren't even that good), a genius strategy if I believed Dave was smart enough to think it up. He wasn't fun, he wasn't interesting, he wasn't a good Survivor player. And that is why he got kicked out after 4 episodes. Not that his larger-then-life ego would allow himself to admit that.
Ami Cusack (Vanuatu, Fans vs Favorites)
Ami loves women. She loves sleeping with them, she likes forming bonds with them, and she loves using them to help her win Survivor (unless your old and unattractive. There's no place for you in female culture!) And she loves making men look dumb in the process of it all. If only she could've pretended to stomach Twila and Scout, she may of kept the record perfect for female winners in men vs women seasons. But Ami was very condescending towards the players she had no use for. And after Twila--a person she couldn't stand--outsmarted her on the show, Ami decided the best way to make herself feel better about the situation was to lead the charge with the 'Twila swore on her sons name' campaign that got a way more attention that it should have. But at least she was classy enough to vote for Twila after she was nice enough to kiss her ass (cuz at the end of the day, Twila is still a woman).
She didn't get any better when viewers got her to return in a second season (ugh...). I'm still amazed at the bitch move she pulled when Ozzy decided to use her in a vote against Erik and she responded by smiling cheerily at him and saying 'thanks to you, I've finally connected with the group. And it's all at your expense! Thank you so much for giving me friends by losing even though you're trying so hard to stay. My happiness should definetly help with that sting you're gonna feel on your way out.' Luckily, it didn't pan out that way.
Yasmin Giles (Samoa)
Yes, she beats out her enemy by a smidge, but she still sucks.
I don't think Ben's choice in words were smart, but Yasmin didn't make it easy on herself by handling a teams loss in one of the worst ways she knew how.
In case you don't remember, Foa Foa lost one of their challenges (one of many) and Yasmin was elected as the person sent to their camp for a day. One of the first words out of her mouth was insulting them and comparing her teams winning streak to that of 'taking candy from a baby' and then grabbing Ben and yelling at him for having the gall to physically place his hands on her in a physical challenge that required physical contact. When Ben responded to her tantrum unapologetically (rightfully so), she became enraged that she wasn't getting the apology she felt so entitled to and got even more bitchy.
And I think it speaks volumes when your team votes you out the first chance they get on because of how much they dislike you . But fair is fair, she was classy at the reunion and had a good answer for handling the douche-y Ben.
Jason Siska (Fans vs Favorites)
I am insulted this guy got put on a team called the 'fan' team. Everything this guy did screamed 'get a clue' and it was enraging.
Jason was pretty invisible up til...the moment we all know him for. You know, he goes to Exile, finds a stick, and believes it to be the hidden idol. Okay, so he's not bright, but so what? Stupid people can be fun and likable. But after he gets Eliza humiliated, he makes it to the last two in the final immunity challenge only to stupidly buy into his enemies fake promise that they won't got backsies on their word and will keep him in if he gives up on the immunity challenge (a promise that wouldn't of mattered if Jason had just won the damn thing cuz in case you didn't know Siska, YOU CAN'T VOTE OUT THE PLAYER WITH THE GODDAMN NECKLACE ON!!!) After the players realize just how dumb the kid is, they decide it's better to keep the smart-as-a-booger around and vote out the player that actually mattered so Jason gets another three days to live. Does he use those extra three days wisely? Does Kim Kardashina pick shitty names for her kids?
He gets sent to Exile Island under the lie-as-plain-as-the-nose-on-my-face, it's 'to find the immunity idol. So why you trippin?' True to his dumbass nature, Jason falls for it again and gives himself another shot to get through TC with the discovery of the real HII, only to blurt it out first chance he gets with a simple 'I swear I'm with you, not the allies I've had forever' story.
So lets sum this all up people: Jason can't figure out when an alliance that has been in place longer then he knows is bullshitting him for their own personal benefit. He will eat up any slop you throw at him because he's about as smart as the stick idol he found. Even when he has a front row seat to that same group of people going back on their word to everyone else. He is another dumb stepping stone to that victory Parvati acquired that season and when a 'hardcore fan' can't understand the basics of decent gameplay, that can be so frustrating to watch. Fuck this guy.
Kimmi Kappenberg (Australia)
Poor Kimmi. What sucks about being her is unlike many others before her, she doesn't have the benefit of blaming her awful personality on terrible editing like the newer breed of Survivors have.
No, Kimmi is one of the old school originals who is best known for letting animal rights get in the way of letting her entire team down. What's worse is her entire character arc is made up of tribe members who do not like her. Sure, there's the chick fight that started over a chick when Alicia got fed up with Kimmi dramatically and stupidly playing animal equality attorney with a group of starving team members. But then she has Jeff saying how she just loves to holler loudly about sex and masturbation. And then there's Michael giving a personal interview about how defensive she gets when he offhandedly remarked how dirty she was after living in a mud pile for several days. Bottom line, in an Survivor era where editing was shared equally, everyone was equally talking about how annoying Kimmi was. As we all were.
Eliza Orlins- (Vanuatu, Fans vs Favorites)
It absolutely blows my mind how much love this girl gets from the Survivor community. How much love? Enough to warrant producers to get her back for a second Goddamn season.
Okay, sure. It was pretty cool to see her constantly dodge Tribal Council after Tribal Council and make it all the way to Final Four before her bush baby eyes got voted out, but what many people seem to forget is she was constantly on the outs within her team cuz people found her just so Goddamn irritating. The only reason anyone bothered to spare her was because she was so fuckin eager to stay in the game she would've voted her own dying daughter out if it meant staying another three days. When she finally wore out her use (which she hilariously didn't even realize), she gave what I can only imagine was an intimidating death stare to Chris in some laughable attempt to make him feel bad, and then became that juror we love to hate. What was it again? Oh yeah: "My question is I DEMAND AN APOLOGY!!" I can't say Twila telling her to go fuck herself was good gameplay, but I'll be damned if it wasn't satisfying having someone finally tell Eliza to shut the fuck up.
She didn't get any better in FvF either. She still talked enough words to make the Holy Bible look like light reading and when she was on the outs, she pathetically monologued to the people in power about how oh-so-loyal she was. To everyone's credit, they didn't respond by cackling in her face about how stupid she thought they all were. Getting literally laughed out of the Tribal Council was a fitting end for this bug-eyed annoying tool.
Danielle DiLorenzo (Exile Island, Heroes vs Villains)
Little tidbit about me: my dad was a hunter who also raised chickens. Sometimes, things like foxes and raccoons would come and steal one of the chickens. In order to lure them out and kill them, my dad bought an audio CD filled with 48 minutes of rabbits getting tortured. Being 7 years old, this noise always made me feel sad and sick. Then, several years later, I heard Danielle talk....and talk....and talk....and now I don't find that noise so awful anymore.
It may sound petty. but a lot of my dislike for Danielle stems from those vocal cords that vibrate together to make that shitty noise that could generously be called a voice. Her thick accent was the equivalent of Rosie O'Donnell doing a stand up act while chewing with her mouth open. She also gets a lazy chick penalty when she handled crazy Shane in a way only a lazy chick with no counter argument can have. First she responded with 'what're you tawkin about? What'sere prawblem?' followed by grabbing a shovel and attempting to build a fire pit cuz she'll be damned if Shane was gonna be right about her.
She also attempted to pull a Natalie White by using Russell to the point where she didn't need him anymore, which may have worked if she didn't stupidly blurt out how tight she and Parvati was through her dumb, emotional sobbing.
And...well...she looks dumb with those horse teeth. She literally looks like a Mr. Ed with two cantaloupes stapled to her chest.
